A self-checkout thief, a capsized gondola, and an odd time to quit a job.

A suspicious gift, a Waffle House tattoo, and a Chipotle bowl assault.

A surprise skull, a brutal commute, and a mall eviction.

Psychedelic strength, alarming headlines, and bright ideas.

A spider surprise, raccoon rabies, and meth-lab Legos.

Used sex toys, Satan in school, and the cost of unruly children.

A record-breaking mullet, deer season, and least competent criminals.

An in-flight biohazard, parrot robbers, and a shortcut through the Great Wall.

Smells like weed, a disappointing time capsule, and trespassing reindeer.

Not-so-smart cars, evolving galaxies, and menacing monkeys.