Adam’s apple covers, soup lozenges, and pizza perfume.

Good lookin’ sticks, a bastard kangaroo, and grandma’s in a hurry.

A stowaway cat, a sad sunfish, and a crack-dealing counselor.

Mean monkeys at Starbucks, the bravest man in Taiwan, and a dingo bit my baby.

Recycled diapers, Mr. Clean & Ms. Dookie, and a coyote in Aldi.

Spare ribs, a severed head, and eating Christmas trees.

GPS mishaps, five gallons of Duke’s, and falling iguanas.

A Christmas miracle, a lost Lego shark, and a bidet bummer.

Bubble wrap dresses, a true jawbreaker, and a casual chess player.

A lavish car burial, air travel woes, and spotting a fake.